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Business, Client Solutions, Finding Your Voice, Humor, Marketing, Marketing Strategy, Social Media Marketing, Target Market

50 Ways to Lose Your Customer

Have you heard the Paul Simon song, “50 Ways to Leave Your Lover“? I was driving to a meeting with a new client to discuss their social media marketing strategy and I heard it on the radio. I had to drive all the way across town for my meeting which can take up to an hour depending on traffic. On the way back to my end of the world, I heard the Simon song again. With my marketing meeting on my mind, I started to sing along and found myself changing the words to marketing phrases as if I was in my my strategy meeting.

Take a break from your day and join the ‘sing-along’ with my new version of 50 Ways to Lose Your Customer:

The problem is all inside your head
She said to me
The answer is easy if you
Take it logically
I’d like to help you in your struggle
To be free
There must be fifty ways
To lose your customer

She said it’s really not my habit
To intrude
Furthermore, I hope my meaning
Won’t be lost or misconstrued
But I’ll repeat myself
At the risk of being crude
There must be fifty ways
To lose your customer
Fifty ways to lose your customer

[CHORUS:]
Facebook posts are whack, Jack
No strategy plan, Stan
Blog content is coy, Roy
Just get yourself free
Running ads on the bus, Gus
Missing your audience much?
Engagement is the key, Lee
And get yourself free

She said it grieves me so
To see you in such pain
I wish there was something I could do
To make you smile again
I said I appreciate that
And would you please explain
About the fifty ways

She said why don’t we both
Just sleep on it tonight
And I believe in the morning
You’ll begin to see the light
And then she left me
And I realized she probably was right
There must be fifty ways
To lose your customer
Fifty ways to lose your customer

[CHORUS:]
Facebook posts are whack, Jack
No strategy plan, Stan
Blog content is coy, Roy
Just get yourself free
Running ads on the bus, Gus
Missing your audience much?
Engagement is the key, Lee
And get yourself free ….

————–

I kept singing the song the rest of the weekend and I came up with a few more to see if I could get to 50 ways. Here are the ones I came up with:

  • Sending robot tweets, Pete
  • Contests are lame, Blane
  • Don’t know what you do, Drew
  • Linkedin comments are phony, Tony

It’s not exactly 50 but Mr Simon couldn’t come up with 50 ways either! Let me know if you come up with your own to add to the list in the comments below.

 

 

Photo credit: Blue Jelly Social Media Icons

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Discussion

2 thoughts on “50 Ways to Lose Your Customer

  1. Good day! This post could not be written any better! Reading through this post reminds me of my good old room mate! He always kept chatting about this. I will forward this page to him. Pretty sure he will have a good read. Thank you for sharing!

    Posted by Enlaces scrapebox | 04/08/2012, 1:42 pm

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